Developing the Thank You Notes Habit: Author: Tom Hopkins

   I learned the value and power of thank you notes   early in life. 

[Anecdote ]When I was a young child, my parents   occasionally went out with friends for dinner.   Invariably, when my parents returned from an   evening out, I saw my mother sit down at her little   desk in the hallway as soon as she got home and   begin to write. One night I asked her what she was   doing. Her answer came straight out of Emily Post [ a cultural icon asserting “good manners” :   “We had such a wonderful time with our dear friends   this evening that I want to jot them a note to thank   them for their friendship and the wonderful dinner.”   

My mother’s simple act of gratitude, expressed to   people who already knew that she and my father appreciated and enjoyed their friendship, helped to   keep my parents’ friendships strong for their entire lifetimes. Because I understood that building relationships is   what selling is all about, I began early in my career to send thank you notes to people. I set a goal to send   ten thank you notes every day. That goal meant   that I had to meet and get the names of at least ten   people every day. I sent thank you notes to people I   met briefly, people I showed properties to, people I   talked with on the telephone, and people I actually   helped to own new homes. I became a thank you   note fool. And guess what happened? By the end of   my third year in sales, my business was 100%   referrals! The people I had expressed gratitude to were happy to send me new clients as a reward for   making them feel appreciated and important. 

I understand that you may not be comfortable at   first with starting the Thank You note habit so I took   the time to write out ten situations in which sending   a Thank You note is appropriate. Then, to help you   even more, I’ve drafted the notes for you. 

   1. Telephone contact Thank you for talking with me   on the telephone. In today’s business world, time is   precious. You can rest assured that I will always be   respectful of the time you invest as we discuss the   possibility of a mutually beneficial business   relationship. 

   2. In Person Contact Thank you. It was a pleasure   meeting you, and my thank you is for the time we   shared. We have been fortunate to serve many   happy clients, and it is my wish to some day be able   to serve you. If you have any questions, please   don’t hesitate to call. 

   3. After Demonstration or Presentation Thank you   for giving me the opportunity to discuss with you our   association for the mutual benefit of our firms. We   believe that quality, blended with excellent service, is   the foundation for a successful business. 

   4. After Purchase: Thank you for giving me the   opportunity to offer you our finest service. We are  confident that you will be happy with this investment   towards future growth. My goal is now to offer   excellent follow-up service so you will have no   reservations about referring others to me who have   similar needs as yours.

   5. For a Referral:  Thank you for your kind referral.   You may rest assured that anyone you refer to me   will receive the highest degree of professional   service possible. 

   6. After Final Refusal Thank you for taking your time   to consider letting me serve you. It is with sincere   regrets that your immediate plans do not include   making the investment at this time. However, if you   need further information or have any questions,   please feel free to call. I will keep you posted on new   developments and changes that may benefit you. 

   7. After They Buy From Someone Else Thank you for   taking your time to analyze my services. I regret   being unable, at this time, to prove to you the   benefits we have to offer. We keep constantly   informed of new developments and changes, so I will   keep in touch with the hope that in the years ahead   we will be able to do business. 

   8. After They Buy From Someone Else, But Offer to   Give You Referrals Thank you for your gracious offer   of giving me referrals. As we discussed, I am   enclosing three of my business cards. I thank you in   advance for placing them in the hands of three of   your friends, acquaintances, or relatives that I might   serve. I will keep in touch and be willing to render my   services as needed. 

   9. To Anyone Who Gives You Service Thank you. It   is gratifying to meet someone dedicated to doing a   good job. Your efforts are sincerely appreciated. If   my company or I can serve you in any way, please   don’t hesitate to call. 

   10. Anniversary Thank You Thank you. It is with   warm regards that I send this note to say hello and   again, thanks for your past patronage. We are   continually changing and improving our products and   services. If you would like an update on our latest   advancements, please give me a call.    The power of expressed gratitude is immense. Put   this tool to work for you today! 

Tom Hopkins is world-renowned as America’s #1 sales trainer. For over 30 years, he has helped millions of sales professionals around the world serve more people through proven-effective selling   skills. His books have sold in the millions, and hundreds of thousands of people benefit from his   recorded audio and video programs every day.

===============================

Artful Questioning Author: Tom Hopkins

Many salespeople who haven’t yet reached the   professional stage think professional selling is   exactly the opposite of what it really is. When you   entered the selling field, you may have thought,   "Now my job is to talk and talk and talk." So off you   go. "Here it is folks. Won't ravel, rust, or rip. Can't   blister, break, or drip. Oh, you're going to love it.   You'd better buy now!" 

   The professional salesperson, the true Champion,   realizes that people have two ears and one mouth,   and each should be used equally. This means that   after talking ten seconds, you switch your mouth   off, switch your ears on, and listen for 20 seconds.   This also means that instead of overwhelming your   future client with words, you encourage them to   talk. Let's compare the two methods.    The average salesperson speaking: "This is the best   there is. Nothing on the market can touch it. We've   got the best products because we're miles ahead of   the competition. You'd better get it."  "This insurance will do more for you than anything   else you can find. You really should hurry and get it."

 "These items are on sale. Why waste your time shopping around? You can't get them for less." 

   When salespeople use such methods, what are they   doing? They're pushing, aren't they? They're   arguing. They're telling people things they don't want   to hear. They're trying to ram obvious self-serving   statements down the future clients' throats. In   effect, they are saying, "I'm out to make you buy   something. The only reason I'm doing that is to put   money in my pocket, and I don't care whether what   you buy helps you or not."

Such tactics quickly drive off everyone except the   few who love to argue. Champion salespeople on   the other hand, never give anyone the impression   that they're pushing them - for the simple reason   that they never push. But they do lead. 

   The Champion leads his or her prospects from the   initial contact to happy involvement in owning the   product or service by not talking all of the time, by   listening most of the time, and by asking artful   questions. In all this alert and pointed questioning,   the true professional maintains a friendly attitude of   interest and understanding that encourages the   prospect to open up and give the desired   information freely. 

   Have you ever been surprised at how freely you've   talked to certain salespeople before buying from   them? They were alert and interested. You felt comfortable with them. Recalling those   conversations, you may think you were leading and   the salesperson was following. Superficially, that was   true - at first. In a deeper sense, however, that   professional salesperson was leading all the way and   you were following all the way. 

   How did that happen? The Champion encourages   you to start off. Once you set your direction, he or   she gets smoothly in front and begins to lead you   toward any of several open paths to purchase.   When artful questioning reveals which of the several   paths is best, the Champion guides you smoothly   and warmly to it. The halter goes over your head so   softly that you never think about bucking. Instead   you buy! 

====================

Dos and Don’ts of Thank-You Notes

Etiquette experts and professional card writers offer advice for making the process easier and even go a little faster. By Daniel Bortz Published Oct. 29, 2019

In the afterglow of a wedding or honeymoon, sitting down to write personalized thank-you notes can be a daunting, and often dreaded, task for most couples, especially those couples who have had large weddings. But do not fret. Etiquette experts and professional card writers have some advice for making the process a little easier.

First, adjust your attitude. Shortly after returning from my own honeymoon in late September, I complained to a friend about the huge stack of thank-you notes I had yet to write. He responded, incredulously, “Are you really whining about people giving you gifts?”

My friend was right. Instead of griping, what I needed to do was change my outlook and show a little more gratitude. “You know what’s great about writing wedding thank you notes,” said Wendy Bomers, a writer at American Greetings. “You get to relive your special day over again and think of all the wonderful people in your lives.” Decide who gets a note.: Everyone who gives you a gift should receive a thank-you note, regardless of whether they attended your wedding. But some other people also deserve a special thanks.

“A lot of couples don’t write thank-you notes to their bridal party, but I think it’s a wonderful idea, especially if they played a big role in helping you organize your wedding,” said Jacqueline Whitmore, an etiquette expert and the founder of the Protocol School of Palm Beach.

The parents of the bride and groom should also receive thank-you cards, Ms. Whitmore said. “The bride can earn brownie points by writing the thank-you note to the groom’s parents and vice versa,” she added.

Jennifer Spector, the director of brand marketing at Zola, a wedding registry and planning website, said if a wedding vendor goes “above and beyond,” the couple should include a thank-you note, with a cash tip, and write the company a positive review online.

Keep track of the time.: The sooner you mail your thank-you notes, the better, but Diane Gottsman, a national etiquette expert based in San Antonio and author of “Modern Etiquette for a Better Life” (Page Street Publishing, 2017), said there’s a hard cutoff date. “Let’s get things straight: You don’t have six months to a year after your wedding to write thank-you notes, that rule is outdated,” she said. “You should have them all sent out within two months after your wedding.”

One way to make the writing process easier, Ms. Spector said, is to use a template. The key, however, is to tailor your message to the gift that you received. You’ll want to create three templates: one for physical gifts, one for cash or gift cards and one for honeymoon fund donations (if you have one).

Keely Chace, a master writer at Hallmark in Kansas City, Mo., said thank-you notes for physical gifts should: acknowledge the gift; elaborate on why you like it or how you’ll use it; and compliment the giver and make a personal connection.

Thank you so much for the terrific cutlery set you gave us for our wedding! It’s already coming in handy with meal prep, and the knife block looks sharp on our kitchen counter. We’re touched by your thoughtfulness, and thrilled that you were able to make it to the wedding. Having you there to share our special day with us meant so much to us. For cash or gift cards, it’s a nice touch to mention how you plan to spend the money, Ms. Chace said, adding that there is no need to mention the gift amount.

We are so grateful for the generous gift. We can’t wait to treat ourselves to a couple’s massage on our next vacation. It means a lot to know you’re thinking of us, and wishing us well as we start out together. Thank you again for your thoughtfulness!

Honeymoon funds, which are typically found on a couple’s wedding website or online registry, enable friends and family to help subsidize the cost of this special, albeit pricey, vacation. (According to the Knot, the average honeymoon now costs $5,342.) Often, couples will specify in their honeymoon fund what activities they’d like to do (like snorkeling or sailing), and wedding guests can then pay for these expenses.

We’re beyond excited about the surfing class you got us. Thanks to you, our honeymoon in Hawaii will be that much more special. We’re so lucky to have a friend like you in our lives.

Remember: This should not be a one-person job.

There should be a fair division of labor between both spouses. Some couples may choose to simply divide their list in half, but there are other options as well. “If one spouse says they don’t want to write thank-you notes because their handwriting is bad, that person should still be contributing,” Ms. Whitmore said. “Maybe they’re stamping and stuffing the envelopes, while their partner writes the thank-you notes.”

Just decide together: There are smart ways to speed things up. One easy suggestion is to buy a glue-tape roller so that you can seal the envelopes quickly. Also, there’s no rule that says you have to wait until after your wedding to send thank-you cards. “I urge people to write their thank-you notes as the gifts come in, and a lot of gifts arrive before the wedding day,” Ms. Spector said.

Ms. Bomers agreed, adding, “It’s kind of exciting to write thank-you notes as you receive gifts, since you’ll be more excited about the gift, and it’s going to show in your notes.” If you don’t want to deal with the hassle of writing thank-you notes by hand, you may consider ordering customized cards online. Zola, for instance, lets customers write personalized messages for each thank-you card for an extra 35 cents per card.

Want to cut out paper altogether and save on postage? Some couples are ditching traditional thank-you cards for e-Cards. “We’re dealing with a new generation now, and I think a lot of millennials are getting more accustomed to sending and receiving thank-you notes online,” Ms. Whitmore said, adding, “If you send an eCard, I recommend sending a photo of you with the gift, or a photo of you dancing at your wedding. It takes effort and time, but it’s worth it.”

Ms. Gottsman, though, had some reservations about that approach. “If you sent your wedding invitation by eCard because you’re eco-friendly, I think a thank-you letter via email might be O.K.,” she said, “but a handwritten note is the most sincere form of appreciation.”